No, I’m not dead. LoL To those of you keeping up, I know it’s been about a week or so since the last time I wrote. A lot has been going on, with work, home life, physical health, mental health, supernatural attacks, etc. Uh-huh. I know that last one caught your attention, but you’ll have to wade through the rest of my cerebral vomit to get to that. 😉
Where to begin? I’ll start with the physical pain. This may be TMI for some of you, but as a woman who is comfortable with her anatomy and a health care worker who accepts the natural functions of the body, I am not put off by talking about or sharing these things. However, if you are triggered in some way or disgusted by discussing the female workings, skip to the next paragraph…. Still with me?… You’re sure?… Okay! So, I have had problems with my reproductive system for YEARS. Literally, since the time I hit puberty. Whether it is heavy bleeding or ovarian cysts, I have had issues for a while. That being said, I’ve also been on birth control for a LONG time. This year, I began to notice some changes that I wasn’t comfortable with: loss of libido, major depression, PAINFUL cramps unlike any I had survived as a teenager, painful intercourse, etc. My doctor said that it appears that I am in sort of an “early menopause” as my body is no longer producing the amount of estrogen it should be. This could be because I’ve been on birth control for so long. She called it premature uterine decay. (Sounds awesome, right?) Well, my husband and I talked and decided that we did not want children. We have our reasons, some selfish and some logical, but I won’t get into all that. We decided to go with an IUD. If you don’t know what that is, it stands for intrauterine device and it’s inserted into the cervix to prevent pregnancy. Because it can have low hormonal output or no hormonal output, my doctor felt that it would be a good way to “reset” my system and allow it to start producing estrogen again. (You didn’t know you’d be getting a medical lecture too did you? LoL)
Anyway, I went in for the insertion. The appointment started out normal. I was escorted into the back, told to strip down and put on the awkward hospital garb, positioned on the examination table with the crinkly paper that sounded like my ass was trying to get into a bag of chips, and had my feet gently placed in the stirrups. After being allowed to relax and then immediately being scared out of my mind with pictures of an early pregnancy from another patient (they were pulled to my file by accident) the procedure was underway! Do not let anyone… ANYONE tell you that it is a painless and simple procedure. Okay, simple, yes, but painless??? HELL NO!!! That was the most painful thing I have ever experienced! Women, take your worst cramp that you’ve ever had and multiply it by a billion. Men, just imagine your entire branch and berries rotting out of your body. Women who have had children… I solemnly respect you now more than ever. I almost passed out and vomited for, like, and hour or longer. Awful…. However…. I can honestly say that I think it was worth it. I have felt so much better, definitely more like myself. I feel like the part of me that holds on to hope, happiness, and joy for safe-keeping had been sleeping and is now awake to help the other half of me stand back up again. At first, I didn’t want to get my hopes up. I also suffer from a type of bipolar depression that includes time periods of happiness (which is just a calm before the storm). But… so far, the storm hasn’t come yet. It’s a scary, yet exciting feeling. I’ll definitely keep you updated, but so far, things are working out. 🙂
Okay, now to the work and mental health portion of this ridiculously long blog post. Still here? Awesome! My job in the healthcare field is one that deals with the public frequently. There are people who I love to see come through the door, and there are names that pop up on my screen that send anxious and dreadful shivers through my body. And then there are the very rare individuals who decide to build a personal vendetta against me because they don’t get their way. These are often people who are addicts (or dealers) that get frustrated when I don’t fall in line with their plans. I have been fortunate enough to avoid confrontation with most of them. They usually understand the laws and policies I am referring to in order to put a stop to their shenanigans. Generally speaking, they give up and move on. Occasionally, there’s an arrest made for those who try to stick with their completely translucent plan. Most know not to fuck with me. And then, there’s that really special case, the one that cares not for anyone (including themselves) that want revenge when things don’t go their way. An arch enemy, if you will. That… is what I’m dealing with at work that is also affecting me mentally. This person has complained to the state board, had an investigation against me and the company I work for commenced, and still continues to come in as boldly as a lion (or as mindless as a kakapo, and not nearly as cute.) Photo for reference:
To make a long story short, the investigation was completed and dismissed. Like I said, I am bound by laws, policies, and ethics that I will not break. Now for the good part: Literally, yesterday April 24th, 2021, she filed ANOTHER complaint with the state board for something just as asinine and time-wasting as the first round. I am at my wits end. At this point, I feel like I’m being harassed. Don’t worry, I’m checking to see if there are any legal steps I can take to get this rabid monkey off my back, but in the meantime, it’s slowly eating away at my patience. And…. it’s eating away at my ability to think, especially in the way of writing any kind of fictional tale. My mind is overtaken by rage right now and that puts a damper on any juicy tales that are hovering in the background for me to bring to life. I’m trying really hard to overcome, hence this long blog post, but just bear with me. I just have to get past this mini-boss level of the game called life, and I’ll be right back at it!
Okay… it’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for (or the one you skipped right to, cheater LoL)….. the main event….. the supernatural warfare!! Okay, it’s a little less dramatic than that, but it’s still pretty interesting and it’s ongoing. I can’t use any names or anything like that, but I will relay what I can. It all started with a couple who are married. They moved in together to begin the new chapter in their story. Then, strange things started to happen. There were odd noises coming from the attic, negative, and sometimes scary disturbances with the atmosphere in the house, and physical accidents. After doing some research, they found out that the husband’s ex-girlfriend had planted a hex bag in the attic and summoned something through the gate she opened that may have been more powerful than she anticipated. I say that because she is a self-proclaimed “dabbler” in the occult, meaning she is ripe for the picking for entities that are more powerful than she can manage. Something used her to come through, and now, the family is trying to fight this entity back to whence it came. There have been priests and witches try to push back the entity and/or find the hex bag. None have been successful and all have fallen ill or been physically hurt. So, where do I fit in to all this? As a paranormal investigator and practitioner of the wiccan arts myself, I was called upon for help and advice. Unfortunately, I live a relevant distance away from the ones under attack, so I can’t be there physically at the moment. That being said, I do have some powerful spells, contacts, and energies that I can lend to them from a distance. They now have at least 4 other practitioners and Christian sources helping them. This situation, I will most definitely keep you updated on. If it comes down to it, I will go to them myself. I have faced threats similar to this before, and I will do so again.
In summary, the one thing ALL of this has in common is having to keep them bottled up inside. Much like the near pornographic tales I am weaving, I can’t allow any of this to be known by the majority of the people around me. I can safely say that most of them wouldn’t want to hear about my vaginal problems. I, under no circumstances, can talk about the pharmaceutical arch-enemy I have recently acquired due to HIPAA laws. And sadly, being a witch in the South is not to be taken lightly. There are more of us out there than you think, but I, for one, have to keep it hush-hush. Acceptance would be non-existent from family and there are still people around that I hear talking about burning us at the stake. I doubt the company I work for would be super proud of it either. So… it’s to the blog I take this information! It’s all for you, my readers. Thank you for letting me have a place to vent and be myself. Without it, I don’t know where I’d be. Much love and lust, especially love, to all of you!!!