Hello, beautiful people! This may be a short blog post, but I wanted to actually write something, for a change. In case you haven’t noticed, I have been sort of M.I.A. lately. I don’t want to be… Believe me. I have just been consumed by work for the last week or so. I have literally had one day off in the last 6 days. It’s been really taxing mentally to keep going. Any free time I have, I just want to rest… Stop moving. Just… Stop. Of course, in doing so, that means putting everything on hiatus, including my writing. I am exhausted. There is so much I want to do, and so much for me to accomplish, but it’s just really discouraging when you are running out of energy and motivation. It’s EXTREMELY discouraging when you know that you are sacrificing the things that make you happy to be able to… Well,… just live. One thing I’ve always had trouble doing is keeping myself in check, forcing myself to finish something that I’ve started. Because I am in a constant struggle with the armies of depression, if something begins to go differently than I expect (or want), I just… stop. A part of me is always fearful of the time the dark forces of my mental adversaries will once again gain the upper hand… And they will gain the upper hand… Then, it will be an uphill climb to see the sun that shines above the low-hanging clouds. Then, I will have the motivation and inspiration to continue. Right now, I’m sort of in a limbo phase. A place where both sides are on the battleground, but no one has made the first move. I, unfortunately, have my job to thank for that, but either way, it was bound to be triggered by something. If not work, then repercussions for helping to banish the dark entity from my friend’s house, or some physical ailment knocking me back a few steps.
By the way, so far, and with the help of other witches, the entity has successfully been bound… for now, at least. We still have a long way to go to remove it entirely, but it’s no longer doing any damage. So, yay!
SOOO…. sorry this blog post took an unexpected turn down the path of anxiety, but maybe this is just what I needed to get out. Maybe I just need to see what is stopping me from continuing my story in writing. And now… maybe that it’s in the open, it will become vulnerable enough to defeat. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to put on my armor. I have a beast to fight… Love and lust to you all!